Showing posts with label Bravo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bravo. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Premieres Tonight on Bravo!




As a New Jersey native, I am really anticipating the premiere of the RHONJ. It seems like old home week to hear the New Jersey accents and to see the small towns in Northern New Jersey, a stones throw from my hometown. Can this series surpass the others?


The following is a review of the show in today's New York Times:


"All the other housewives, those passels of pampered, primping, social-climbing, Botox-injecting spendthrifts in Orange County, Atlanta and New York, are not the real thing.
All those McMansions, swimming pools, boutiques, charity auctions and spa splurges have been merely rehearsals, introductory rounds leading to the apotheosis of the Bravo “Real Housewives” franchise, “The Real Housewives of New Jersey.”
The New Jersey housewives are more real and more riveting than their predecessors because, well, they are from New Jersey, and also because they so closely mirror the make-believe characters in “The Sopranos.” The best reality shows look like fiction. The five women who make their debuts on Bravo on Tuesday night are buffed and polished to resemble real-life versions of Carmela Soprano, loud, nasal, nouveau-riche wives who raise spoiled children and spend their husbands’ money in vast marble and onyx starter palaces in Franklin Lakes, N.J. They boast about everything, including how soon they qualified for the black American Express card. As Danielle Staub puts it, “I actually got mine before Madonna did.”
Viewers already know the milieu, the accent and the attitude. The rest is delicious: clannish sisters and sisters-in-law who squabble among themselves but band against newcomers.
“We’re a large Italian family and we’re tougher than most,” Caroline Manzo, the matriarch in the group, explains. “Before I like you, I don’t like you.”
Toughness is part of the pedigree. Caroline is married to Albert Manzo, owner of the Brownstone, a catering and banquet business in Paterson N.J., and the son of Albert (Tiny) Manzo, whose 350-pound body was found riddled with gunshot wounds, his arms and legs bound in plastic, in the trunk of his Lincoln Continental in 1983.
This may be the most preposterous “Housewives” edition, but it’s also the most believable. The suffocating family ties are an improvement over past incarnations, when producers often threw together women who were not really that close and whose frictions often seemed forced. These women actually do know one another well, talk every day and raise their children together (badly). The camera crew seems to be eavesdropping, rather than masterminding. Some of the women seem to have a sense of humor, or at least to enjoy the joke that is their lives on film.
Caroline’s baby sister Dina, a statuesque blonde, is married to Albert’s brother, Tommy, so they are sisters married to brothers. The sisters’ brother, Chris, is married to Jacqueline Laurita, a former Las Vegas cosmetologist, and Dina and Caroline treat Jacqueline as a younger, more biddable sister.
“Her heart is as big as her bubbies,” Dina says of her sister-in-law, meaning it as a compliment. (Bubbies is their preferred term for breasts, a topic that is always on the table.)
They are not directly related to Teresa Giudice, who is married to Joe, a self-described entrepreneur and the owner of a construction business, but they might as well be. Teresa, the mother of three small girls, is the biggest spender in the group, always shopping for new clothes and more ornate furniture for her family’s unfinished French-style chateau.
The economic slump is rarely if ever mentioned on “Real Housewives.” Partly, that’s because it’s a buzzkill for viewers hooked on the free-floating vulgarity. But the men and women who agree to be on the show have more prosaic motives than just vanity or exhibitionism — fame brings publicity, and publicity is good for business, be it catering, event planning or real estate.
So the recession is mentioned only in passing. “I hear the economy’s crashing,” Teresa says saucily on her way to another spree. “So that’s why I pay cash.”
Danielle, who is divorced and not a relative or even Italian-American, is the outsider. She befriended Jacqueline at the beauty parlor, and is on “frenemy” terms with the rest of the women. None are particularly prudish or reserved, but Danielle has no secrets, not even about phone sex.
Locations and accents change, but the faces (frozen) and the formula never alter. The humor lies in the editing, and one of the hallmarks of “Real Housewives” is its reliance on ironic contrast: a woman makes a boastful assertion that is instantly contradicted by tape of her doing or saying the opposite.
“I am so not a stage mom,” Teresa says, while the show turns to footage of her coaching her young daughter, Gia, who is made up like a pageant contestant for a dance recital.
Bravo has already shown a “preview special” that contains much of the material found in Tuesday’s premiere episode. It doesn’t matter. There is nothing linear to the show’s narrative; instead, cat fights and outrageous remarks are played and replayed in every episode in a continuous estrogen loop. Like Nicholson Baker’s time-lapse novels, each season of “Real Housewives” can take weeks, and endless detours and heated arguments, to get from the nail salon to the fashion show.
“Housewives of New York City” seems to drag on forever because there is something so dismal and joyless about that clique of arrivistes. “Housewives of New Jersey” is more farcical, less phony and a lot more fun

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Random Thoughts About Millionaire Matchmaker Patty Stanger




Yes, I admit that I have watched this season's Millionaire Matchmaker. I am absolutely astonished to see how Patty Stanger has marketed herself to be the matchmaker of all times. Do I watch to see how many unhappy millionaires are unable to find happiness on their own? Perhaps. Do I watch to see which of these mostly neurotic males will throw down in excess of $30,000 for a one year membership to a club of mostly vacuous mass produced Barbies? Perhaps. Or to watch the pathetic cocktail parties? Maybe so. Do I watch to see Patty("Tranny wants a cracker") the parrot Stanger repeats her expensive crass advice over and over again? Definitely not. I am so sick of hearing "does the penis go up or down off the couch" over and over again. The real reason I enjoy this show is to marvel how Patty does not heed her own advice! Has she looked in the mirror recently? Or has she been looking at the airbrushed promotional shots of herself...you know the ones which show her with thin long legs and a slim body. In relative terms, Betheny of RHONY does not need her photos airbrushed. Patty does!Here are some other random thoughts about Patty:


  • She looks just like a tranny I saw in the Lucky Cheng Drag Show in Vegas

  • Her wig/hair is heinous.....you are too friggin old to wear your hair like a Patty Playpal doll...for those of you who remember

  • Her makeup is totally tranny style....it just makes her look harder and older...lighten up on the makeup

  • I know that she has a makeover service...why hasnt she used it herself?

  • In light of her 99% success rate(hard to believe), why hasn't Patty walked down the aisle...bullshit on the notion that she is not ready. Don't believe it.

  • Her clothing is totally tacky and cheap looking....too short, tight and low cut for her body type. You are in Beverly Hills, Patty....why don't you invest some of your ridiculous fees and hire a stylist for both you and your mohawked COO and his goth girlfriend?

  • How about some charm school lessons? Perhaps you can consult with RHONY's Countess Luann.

  • How about some basic grammar/diction lessons?

Kudos to Gilmore at http://www.prettyontheoutside.com/ once again for the fabulous pen and ink caricatures of Patty. This show is over the top ridiculous!! Your thoughts?

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Candid Confessions of Atlanta Store Managers About Big Poppa and Kimberly Zolciak of the Real Housewives of Atlanta


Please check out the fabulous website www.prettyontheoutside.com/gilmore to admire more incredible pieces of art and commentary.

On Friday night,I had the pleasure of dining with some friends who are in the retail business.They are both managers of luxury retail clothing and accessory stores in Atlanta. I asked them whether any of the Real Housewives of Atlanta shop with them. One of my friends, who is the manager of a women's clothing store, said that Kim Zolciak shopped with her. The clothing in this particular store (not Dior which Kim constantly talks about) runs small. As any viewer of the show can clearly see, Kim is not petite in any sense of the word. She is a big chubby girl who flaunts her fake boobs all of the time. I was informed that Kim requested all of her shirts in size extra small so that her cleavage was always exposed. What an exhibitionist and attention seeker!! She added that Kim definitely had a compulsive spending problem and purchased one of everything, whether it fit her or not. Can you say obsessive compulsive disorder? I hope she is investing in a good therapist! My friend also stated that Kim was very loud and very demanding. On another occasion, my friend and some of her associates were at a table at a now defunct bar/restaurant called "The Clubhouse". Kim walked in and pitched a fit because my friend was sitting at "her table". Are you surprised? NOT! Where does she get the notion that the world revolves around Kim?


My other friend, who used to manage a very upscale French boutique which is known for its intialed handbags and accessories, said that Big Poppa Lee Najjar and his wife shopped there frequently. They spent alot of money but talked down to the manager and the employees.

Question: What does Mrs. Najjar thinks of Kim and the Real Housewives of Atlanta? I am curious to see how this all unfolds. Can you say Season 2?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Great Kim Zolciak Caricature!!

This great caricature was created by Gilmore, writer and artist extraordinaire of the blog http://prettyontheoutside.typepad.com/gilmore. She creates wonderful ink on paper portraits of all of the housewives with great commentary. Make sure to check this blog out.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Bankruptcy Public Records of One of the Real Housewives of Atlanta

This is a matter of public record. The following appears on the Public Records from the Chapter 7 Bankruptcy of Lisa Wu Sweat( now Sharon Hartwell) on the Real Housewives of Atlanta. At the time she was married to music man Keith Sweat and was unsuccessful in making a movie entitled "Blackball".

UNITED STATES BANKRUPTCY COURT
NORTHERN DISTRICT OF GEORGIA
ATLANTA DIVISION
IN THE MATTER OF: : CASE NUMBER: A05-67727-PWB
:
SHARON LISA SWEAT :
a/k/a LISA WU SWEAT :
a/k/a SHARON MILLETTE WU, ::
IN PROCEEDINGS UNDER
: CHAPTER 7 OF THE
Debtor. : BANKRUPTCY CODE
::
KEITH SWEAT, ::
Plaintiff ::
v. ::
SHARON LISA SWEAT : ADVERSARY PROCEEDING
a/k/a LISA WU SWEAT : NO. 05-6331
a/k/a SHARON MILLETTE WU, ::
Defendant. :
ORDER DENYING MOTION TO EXCLUDE ISSUE FROM PRETRIAL ORDER
On March 21, 2007, the Court conducted a pretrial conference with counsel for the
Plaintiff and counsel for the Debtor. In response to issues raised at the pretrial conference, the
Debtor has filed a motion to exclude from the proposed pretrial order the issue of whether the
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Debtor fraudulently misappropriated the Plaintiff’s name and likeness. The Plaintiff opposes the
Debtor’s motion.
The following facts are undisputed according to the proposed pretrial order. The Debtor
is the ex-wife of the Plaintiff. The Debtor was and is the sole shareholder and director of Black
Ball, Inc., a Georgia corporation created for the purpose of holding and owning the movie, “Black
Ball.” The Plaintiff entered into a written agreement with the Debtor and Black Ball, Inc., whereby
he loaned the Debtor $150,000 to help fund production of the movie. The agreement contained
terms for repayment of the loan, as well as terms for the distribution of compensation of profits and
restrictions on the sale and licensing of the movie.
The Plaintiff contends that the Debtor and her distribution company entered into a
distribution agreement with another entity (which then entered into a second agreement with
another party) for the distribution and sale of the film without the Plaintiff’s permission. The
Plaintiff contends that the Debtor failed to obtain his written approval before entering into a
distribution agreement; wrongfully concealed from the Plaintiff the existence of these agreements;
failed to account for loan proceeds; concealed profits arising from the distribution agreement; and
made false and fraudulent statements pertaining to the sale and licensing of the movie. The Debtor
disputes the allegations and, inter alia, contends that she has received no compensation from the
movie and that the parties varied the terms of the agreement between themselves.
At issue is the Plaintiff’s inclusion of the question of whether the Debtor “fraudulently
misappropriated Plaintiff’s name and likeness” in the Plaintiff’s statement of legal issues to be
tried. The Plaintiff’s statement of the case also states that the Debtor “willfully and maliciously
misappropriated Plaintiff’s name in connection with the Movie and is not entitled to a discharge
under 11 U.S.C. § 523(a)(6) based on the same.” The Debtor objects to this issue being included
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(and, it follows, being litigated and tried) and contends that the inclusion of the Plaintiff’s name
in the credits as executive producer was appropriate and that the Plaintiff has not presented any
facts which support his position that the Debtor misappropriated his name and likeness.
If the Plaintiff had failed to properly plead this issue, thereby depriving the Debtor of the
ability to prepare a defense in anticipation of trial, the Debtor arguably would have a basis for
objecting to inclusion of this issue in the pretrial order. However, the Plaintiff’s complaint
sufficiently sets forth this claim as follows (Complaint, ¶ 34):
The debt owing Plaintiff is for and based, at least in part, upon the willful and
malicious injury by the Debtor to the Plaintiff or to the property of the
Plaintiff. For example and without limitation:
a. The Debtor has improperly associated the Plaintiff’s name with the Movie.
A factual dispute as to whether the Plaintiff can prove his claim is not a basis for
exclusion of the claim from the pretrial order. The time for filing a motion for summary judgment
expired prior to the submission of the pretrial order and the pretrial conference and it is clear that
even if such a motion was properly before the Court, based on the divergent versions of the facts
as reflected in the parties’ separate statements of the case included in the pretrial order, there are
genuine issues as to material facts. Based on the foregoing, the Court concludes that there is no
basis for excluding the issue of whether the Debtor fraudulently misappropriated Plaintiff’s name
and likeness in connection with the movie. Therefore, it is
ORDERED that the Debtor’s motion is denied.
The Clerk is directed to serve copies of this Order on counsel for the Plaintiff and
counsel for the Defendant.
End of Document